Wednesday Morning Patrol

Date: 14 JAN 2014
Time: 0745 CST
Location: Western Hemisphere: N America Continent: US Country: Illinois State: Lasalle County: Peru township and city: Angus sector

To: Scottie High Command
From: Sgt Angus Fala
Re: AM Patrol
Mission Goals: recon and threat suppression
Equipment: 1 high tech camouflage uniform blue and orange
Personnel: Sgt Angus Fala, Pfc Ainsley Mckenna, 1 hooman combat photographer
Environmental Conditions: cloudy, 4F (-16C), Freezing Fog
Patrol Length: .8 miles (1.35k)
Result: Effective
Enemy/Neutral/Friendly/Civilian Casualties: 0/0/0/0

Narrative: went on a morning patrol.  Had to walk in street as sidewalks covered with white frozen precipitation (aka snow). Only enemy sighted were 2 black dogs who launched approximately 15 medium range acoustic salvos (aka barks) in our direction. There fire was ineffective.  We quickly determined they were quarantined in their boundary constraint structure (aka fence) and did not return fire and continued our patrol. We observed a yellow little hooman and would be juvenile delinquent personnel carrier (aka skool bus). Interestingly, bus stopped in front of a residence but no little hoomans came out. Yellow personnel carrier moved on with no pickup. I recommend that SWAT (scottie weapons and tactics) division send a team on a no knock insertion into the house to ascertain that no terrorists, hobos, joggers, bicyclists or huskies are holding that household hostage. We made it back to Base safety.   Jpg of our patrol attached to this report.

I certify this report is accurate.
Sgt Angus Fala


10 thoughts on “Wednesday Morning Patrol

  1. Evening sir .. WASP..(. Western Australian Scottie Patrol) report. Barked at fatso to open slding door..( too far to walk to self opening scottie door ) out into the now chillier 10 pm enviorment 30c (86F) ran to known location of Rat highway launching acoustic salvos much to fatsos digust. Distance 15 meters. Checked Rat highway movement .. Run back to fatso still at door with large spider on my back.. See fatso flee in loyal i follow fatso but heez keeps running. Said large spider now loose inside the hooman domain. Retired to barracks and confy bed..graduually dropped off to the sounds of fatso negotiating large spider ..😀😀😀😀😀

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I am shaking my head in disbelief as to just how amazing you are Angus. You take care of every body even when the little yellow did not drive off with any new passengers!! Amazing sgt !!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. East of Angus sector, SW PA Fergus/Guinness sector: Hoomans left us alone today so no outside patrol. Inside acoustic salvos for blue/white Am. flag truck and bundled dressed mail carrier who dared navigate the snow/ice covered walk. Must have frightened said person as a pkg was dropped on front entrance and left up for grabs. Earned naps finished the event.


  4. Pvt. Benjamin here, Sir. (Hmmm…that sounds vaguely familiar.) Anyway, reporting in from the Northeast Angus Sector, New England Division, state of New Hampshire, City of Portsmouth/Ben sector. Outside patrol uneventful except for continuing surveillance on nearby structure containing Yellow Lab. Launched acoustic salvos at said structure as warning for occupant detainees to remain inside. Sustained injury on front right paw due to frozen ground precipitation and had to be air lifted by human back to base. I received warm towel massage and resumed my station on couch in front of fireplace to recover.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Be careful Ben – I’ve had quite a few run ins in my day with Labs. A lot of inexperienced soldiers confuse them with Goldens – but Labs pack quite a lot more attitude.


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