In the later classes of the curriculum, The Art of the Ambush, you will learn the advanced art of the ambush.
Just this morning, I surprised a cocker spaniel walking on MY sidewalk with a vicious and effective short range auditory salvos. And I am sure the neighbors appreciated being woken up at 5:55 am on a Sunday morning by my efforts.
In your class, you will learn advanced topics of ambushing…as you see below from my photo from this morning, which is what the unsuspecting Cocker Spaniel would have observed….
Can you see me in the picture? Look with a quick glance, just like a stoopid, half witted cocker spaniel would…Well, do you see me? Huh? Do you? NO, you DON’t see me, do you????
Now, let me help you out here. Look again, same picture, and this time I am going to help you out and point me out:
Do you see me now? How did you miss me before? Because of advanced ambushing…
Notice that I take advantage of my coloring and fade into the background. Also, notice that the bushes overwhelm the eye, and you can’t even notice me. Plus the black fence gives me a spectrum obstacle for the untrained eye – and your eye tends not to penetrate the fence line, and you skip over the Scottie lying hidden.
Oh, what’s that you say in the back? I can’t hear you…what’s that? You say doesn’t the backdoor light illuminate me?
WRONG, you maroon! You flunk the class!
The light actually doesn’t penetrate my position, and actually attracts the focus to the back door and the house, and leaves me in the darkness…waiting…waiting…waiting to POUNCE!!!!
So to the untrained Scottie, this appears to be simply just a Scottie sitting at the fence. But to you, after you take my coursework on the Art of the Ambush, you will see it is an ingeniously and well thought out military maneuver.
Happy Ambushing today!
2nd Lt. Ainsley McKenna, Chief Training Officer and Strategist
Scottie 21st Illinois Regiment