So, this morning, 5 am, Catman took this picture with my new best buddy, Goldie McGolderson.

This brought a discussion on Facebook – oh, you need a new Scottie…oh, does this mean you are getting a Golden…oh, don’t you know that two dogs is only as much trouble as one.

You people are overthinking this! I just have a friend named Goldie McGolderson – nothing more, nothing less.

But while we are overthinking this, allow me to REALLY OVERTHINK us all!

Let me introduce to you, Ainsley’s Theorem on Dog Trouble correlated to the number of dogs!

Please refer below to my whiteboard scribblings….

Got it? Need me to explain? OK…on the upper left, is an x-y graph, with x (the horizontal line) noting the number of dogs, and y (the vertical axis) the amount of trouble or work in caring for the dogs. The line in the graph, refers to the amount of trouble based on anecdotes, notes, experiments, and observations. As you can tell, when you have one dog, it is 1 unit of trouble. When you have 2 dogs, it is 4 units of trouble. When you have 3, it is 8, 4 is 16, etc.

This can be boiled down to my formula written in the right corner of my whiteboard – it states

When x (number of dogs) is 1, then y (trouble) is 2 to the power of x-1. So if you plug in 1 there, that gives you 2 to the zero power, or 1.

When x (number of dogs) is greater than 1, then y (trouble) is 2 to the power of x. So if you plug in 2, that gives you 2 to the power of 2, or 4.

There….so 2 dogs is 4 times more trouble than 1. That’s why I would prefer to be an only dog. I get all the treats, I get all the attention, and Mama gets only one unit of trouble.

SCIENTIFIC FACT – NON DEBATABLE!

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indyandlucy

said:Mom was never good in math; she was an English major. This is a foreign language to her.

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Kismet

said:For the fun factor, use cubes instead of squares.

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idiane2scots

said:Imteresting theory, Ainsley. however, I am thinking someone named Ainsley might just like to be the only dog in the house and being the only source of ‘trouble!’ Getting a little spoiled, are we, dear Missy? Good! That’s just what the doctor ordered!

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Skyler Braveheart

said:Ainsley, I found this post particularly en point, as Mama did not get approved for Fiona. This will show her that all is well.

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fergusnguinness

said:Which part of the exam did she fail Skyler BH? We think she as treats, pats, hugs, loves, walkies, clean ups, clean face, brushed tail all down pat. Maybe she failed the fashion boots part?????

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Skyler Braveheart

said:It was decided by the Rescue that Fiona was not the right dog for our family., based on an observed interaction. They were worried I would not accept another dog, cause the Mater and I are so tight. Fiona and I sniffed each other’s butts and then they told Mama to pick her up. Mama started talking to Fiona as she was picking her up, and was told to be quiet. Then, she sat on Mam’s lap, where she wiggled, and I sat by them, calmly. When she got the news, Mama boo hooed, but I got her back on track. She really thought it would happen. We weren’t looking wasn’t looking for another dog, she just wanted to adopt Fiona. Thank you for your kind comments about the quality of care I receive. I think I have a pretty good life. Your pal, Skyler Braveheart

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fergusnguinness

said:We are very sorry to hear this. Mom knows the fluttering feel in the chest hoping something will happen but afraid to hope too much. We all love our doggies differently but all the same with the love and devotion given to them. You must cuddle up to Mater and kiss her hand and legs and feet Skyler BH. She is needing you more than ever right now.

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Karen Clarke

said:Ainsley, I always appreciate your mathematical approach. Might I suggest that since there is already 1 dog in the house (you, my beautiful scientist) that the trouble of 2 dogs should be the power of 2-1.? That might change your calculation a bit.

Karen

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ginaandjordanandmolly

said:As I was never any good at math but my logic tells me I should believe what Karen Clarke said. Makes sense. Scientific fact. Non debatable. Much less trouble.

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snowywestie

said:Wow, Ainsley—good thing for Kenzie that Mom can’t do Math. Do you have a theorem for the chaos created by 2 cats plus 2 dogs, when said dogs consider cats vermin? My skills lie on the sniffing out trouble side, not math.

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Anonymous

said:Ainsley, Eventually it’s possible that Catman and Mama will decide that a new brother will come to live with you. I hope if this happens you’ll love it. In my house each time I lost a little person to the Rainbow Bridge, the remaining little person suffered as much as I did. I found that the new little person always brough new adventures and new fun. Funnier still, you might find that you are really protective of your little brother (or sister) as my Silby is with his baby sister Lejla. She bothers the bejesus out off him because she’s a baby. But if anyone else looks sideways at her — he steps right up. I think my formular would be, a dog in every room..

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fergusnguinness

said:From our Moms experience one was the same as two or two were the same as one….human or animal. Now when it got to three of each that was a different story but she found the best solution was three of each.

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Cheryl Fugate

said:Yes while this a good theory your mama only gets one X to the1 factor of loving and fun. You have to take the science out and go with the heart on this one and maybe mama just isn’t ready yet. Heart fact non-debatable

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