The Legendary Lost City of The Scottie Kings – Chapter 1

2017 March 30 Ainsley 02

Eddie  was looking over the darkening North Sea.  Behind him, the warm candle light glow of his stone cottage near Tarbet Ness beckoned, but Eddie, accompanied by his dog Belle, was standing still on the cliff, watching the sea hurtle into the cliffs below, powered by a suddenly strong easterly wind.  Until recently, no one in their right mind would live in such a secluded spot.  The countryside was far too dangerous.  But under the enlightened rule of the Scottie Kings, banditry was non-existent allowing residents to spread out among the kingdom.  Still, though, Eddie periodically visited the capitol city, about 20 miles away, to trade crops and livestock for goods that his family needed.

“I guess we better head in for supper, Belle, Eddie said to his golden colored dog.” Eddie said, his breath rising a wispy white in the cool dark Scottish air.

“We’ll hunt more ducks tomorrow,” Eddie said, referring to his and Belle’s nemesis, the waterfowls that were the scourge of his small subsistance farm.

As Eddie and his dog Belle entered the small cottage, behind him in the cold dark ocean a solitary light flickered in the waves,  far away on the horizon.   The light quickly became steady, and if Eddie had been still looking, he would have noticed the light was soon accompanied by first a few, then dozens, of other lights,out on the dark sea.

Out on the water, under that first light, sailed a ship.  A flagship of a vast fleet.  And on that flagship stood the Siberian Lord Vlad the Envious.  Lord Vlad was genuine Grade A 100% Evil.  Lord Vlad stood shirtless, wearing black pants embroidered with jewels from plunder.  The evil Lord was accompanied by 2 pure massive white Siberian Tigers.  Also on the ship were about a hundred officers, soldiers, and crew, and on the rowing deck and hold of the ship were 89 prisoners of war, slaves really, rowing away for 3 straight months.  Lord Vlad started with 323 prisoners on his flagship when he started.  The seventy some odd other ships were similarly equipped with prisoners, but they were also equipped with a large number of the worst, most wicket bunch of bloodthirsty mercenary soldiers known to this hemisphere.  And worse yet, the ships held thousands of the meanest canines on the planet.  Some dogs are good and occasionally, by mistake, don’t always good things.  Other dogs are neither bad nor good but sometimes do bad things.  And some dogs are plain bad, and do evil things.  Those dogs are called Siberian Huskies.  And that’s what Lord Vlad had – thousands of the evil eyed blue eyed beasts, waiting to do their evil master’s bidding.

“Your Lordship, Scotland approaches.  Where do we land our ships, sir?” said Lord Vlad’s second in command, Admiral Akira.

“It’s all been prearranged, Admiral” said Lord Vlad, stroking the head of his favorite tiger, Shakira.  “Look for the light that flashes three times, two quick, and one long.  That’s where we come ashore.  You see, we have friends among our enemies in Scotland.  With their help, by this time tomorrow, we will be feasting in King Angus’s Palace Ballroom while sifting though the kingdom’s treasure.”  Then Lord Vlad tipped his head back in a most evil, deep, ominous laugh.

 

 

The Legendary Lost City of the Scottie Kings – Prologue

Ainsley reading book

(Author’s Note – this is the first segment of a monumental piece of literature that I am writing about an important historical component of our Scottish Terrier Legacy.  More to follow as I write it – Ainsley McKenna)

King Angus The 33rd looked over his city. For centuries now, the Kingdom flourished – as the hoomans came to accept the benevolent, firm, fair, and wise rule of the Scottish Terrier. All appeared well over the King’s large and flourishing Capitol city tonight as smoke from the many chimneys curled into the cool moonless autumn sky.

King Angus sighed at his palace balcony. He was just the latest in a long succession of Scottie Kings. The lands had been united, and tomorrow, at the High Council, he would introduce reforms that would transform the kingdom. It would make the Kingdom even more a beacon for the world – and once his new initiatives were in place, he would allow his closed lands to open up to the outside world, and let the whole world observe the glory that a Scottie realm can derive for its people. And its canines. His Kingdom – and the world – were ready for mutual discovery of each other.

The only thing that nagged in his head were reports from the East. Siberia. He had heard from traders and foreign emissaries that the Siberian ruler, the evil Vlad the Envious, thirsted for Angus’s Kingdom.

But King Angus put that small nagging thought outside his mind. Though he had doubts about his Border Terrier guards at the frontier, they were recommended by his consul, Baron Bancroft. Bancroft was the leader of the Airedale Terrier Regiment, who were temporarily on Capitol Guard duty since The Kingdom’s Scottie Special Forces were mopping up the Labrador uprising across the sea to the west. King Angus hated to have his crack Scottie guards so far away, but he had no reason to doubt that the Airedales and Borders were up to defending the kingdom. Still, something didn’t seem quite right. But, Angus reassured himself, there were no threats on the horizon.

“Time for Dinner, Sire” – interrupted his man servant, Cat-fer..

King Angus’s nagging thoughts receded as he headed inside for dinner. Just then, a cold wind blew in from the East.

 

George – 7 weeks to 12 weeks

Someone gave us the idea of taking pictures of me and George every week and see how he is growing.  So we did that.

Here is George 3 days after we got him.  He was 7 weeks old here, and he weighed 8 pounds…

ainsley and george and mr bear 3-5-2016 8-31-18 AM

Sorry he is moving!  He wouldn’t be still.


 

I can’t find the picture for week 8, so here is George at week 9, and he is 11 pounds here….

george and mr bear and ainsley 3-19-2016 11-28-27 AM

I’m looking away – can’t bear to look at him getting bigger.  And as you might can tell, Mr. Bear had to get in the sauce before he could muster the bravery to be around George.


 

Week 10, I didn’t get one from the couch (lost that one too!).  So here we are in the kitchen (George weighed in at about 14 pounds)….


ainsley and george 3-26-2016 9-01-50 PM


Forgot to take a picture in week 11.  Finally, here is the picture from this past Saturday…George at week 12, and now 18 pounds…

week12 4-9-2016 2-14-25 PM

I think it is fair to say that Mr. Bear is positively hammered!

 

Headwear Required

My brother, the late great Angus Fala, loved his headwear.  Aunt Judy first introduced Angus to headwear, and he took to it quite eagerly.  As you see below here in the following slide show with just 3 of the many various headwears that Angus enjoyed.

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In late 2014, Aunt Judy gave Angus a helmet, with his rank emblazoned on the front – and Angus called the helmet his Polymer Based Attack Repellent Cranium Cover, or PBARCC for short (that would be pronounced “Pee-Bark”).  Perhaps one of his favorite pictures was this one, taken shortly before Angus passed on.

angus in helmet 1-16-2015 8-22-26 AM


After Angus passed on to the Rainbow Bridge, the gauntlet for wearing headwear passed to me.  At first I was hesitant, but then Angus spoke to me in a dream, and told me it was my job now, the torch had been passed.  Overnight I became an excellent headwear wearer.  I got so good at it that when I travel, people take pictures of me.

ainsley pbarcc peoria 10-5-2015 2-35-53 PM


I have become an advocate of headwear.  Mr.Bear has become pretty good at it…

angus ainsley mrbear office 1-8-2015 11-46-33 AM

I even convinced the Commander, Rascal B. Dascal, a copperhead killing old guard Scottie, about the joys of headwearing, as Commander Dascal demonstrates here….

rascal b. dascal pbarcc 10-5-2015 2-45-06 PM

Doesn’t the commander look just fabulous?


 

One big problem though.  This new guy at the house, George Kerby…I’m not so sure about this boy.  We introduced him to the joys of headwear last night…I don’t think he gets it, do you?

ainsley and george  headwear 3-30-2016 6-56-00 PM 3-30-2016 6-56-00 PM

Hmmm.  A work in progress, to be sure.

Blog at ya later.

Ainsley McKenna, CEO,

Angus Fala Worldwide Enterprises

 

 

My Apologies to the Irish*

*Irish Setters that is

My hoomans are Scottie people, with one caveat.  Mama does love Golden Retrievers, and we’ve had three.  Mama’s best friend, Deb, the author, on the other hand, is an Irish Setter person.  I believe she has had 5 of them.  Right now she has two – Conner, and Jamie.

Mama has been friends with Deb for 25 years – and me and my late great brother Angus, have been friends with her Irish Setters too.  And I got plenty of pictures to prove it..

Here is Angus, in 2009, romping with Conner in the backyard of Deb’s House….2009 Sept 12 Angus Conner


Here I am late last month, stopping at the Irish Setter’s house on my way to Oklahoma:

ainsley and jamie and conner 2-26-2016 10-47-33 AM


See -we got along well.  That is we got along well, BG.  Before George.

So Deb and her daughter, Sarah, were going to come and visit us last weekend and stay several days.  Catman said “why don’t you bring your Irish Setters, Conner and Jamie?  George would love to see them!”

Deb said,”Are you sure?”

Catman:  “Sure, they will get around great.  George just a little puppy!”

Stoopid stoopid Catman.

As soon at the Irish Setters entered the Ainsley Institute, they were hounded, relentlessly, by one George Kerby.

george and irish setters 3-19-2016 11-07-09 AM

George would jump on them, try to grab their skirts, their lips, and try to grab their….well, I don’t think I can say what he tried to grab on a family oriented blog.  See the full grown adult Irish Setter running away from the 12 pound puppy.

We even made a video of George playing, while the Setters are trying to run for their lives:

So they came here on Friday, by Saturday night, the Irish Setters had packed their bags and were ready to go home.  So Catman, since he was the responsible party in the first place, offered to drive them 2 hours to Springfield, Illinois, about half way to their house, where the Irish Setter’s Daddy met him and took them on home.  And Conner & Jamie were happy, HAPPY, to leave.  I know this for a fact, because I accompanied them on their farewell trip, trying to apologize on behalf of Golden brother.

irish setters in car going home 3-20-2016 10-38-33 AM

So on behalf of me, Mama, Lily and Herman the cats, Catman, and Mr. Bear – we apologize, Conner & Jaimie, for the actions of my demon brother.  Maybe you can come visit us again someday – when George is grown up, and we have hired a priest to do an exorcism on him or sumthing.

Again, sorry guys – but not all is lost…I did get one good picture out of the visit – me, George, Conner and Jamie.

group shot adjusted 3-19-2016 11-31-14 AM

 

 

 

New Game from Angus Fala Worldwide Enterprises

Hey Kids!

Tired of playing Cops and Robbers with your friends?  Don’t want to be guilty of cultural appropriation by playing Cowboys and Indians????

Well, we here at Angus Fala Worldwide Enterprises have invented a new game just for you!

We call it Trump Supporter Versus Anti-Trump Activist!

Watching all the coverage on CNN and you want to be in on the action too?  But Mama won’t let you go?

Well, we have tne next best thing – Trump Versus Anti Trump!  Available now at your favorite on-line toy retailer or your closest toy department of a mass-market merchandiser!

You can pretend you are right there in the action, with the cameras rolling!  Your friend can call you a Racist Bully, and you can call your friend an Anti-American Commie, and let the fun begin!

Here I am playing an Anti-Trump Activist, and George Kerby is playing a Trump Supporter!

 

Hurry, and buy now!  My game is just flying off the shelf as fast as a billionaire in Trump One!

And coming soon, my new version, Trump Versus Anti-Trump 2.0.  It’s a multiplayer game, in which two of you can wrestle like you are on the auditorium floor, and your other friends can boo and cheer, and your Mama can yell into a microphone “Get Em Out of Here, Punch them in the Face!”

Fun for all Ages!

 

George Kerby – the First Week

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Today marked the first week of George Kerby, the Golden Retriever, living with me at the Ainsley Institute.  Today also marked his 8 week birthday.

Slide show above shows some of the highlights of the week.  Thursday, we took him to the vet, and Dr. Pokey pronounced George in good health – which is quite the relief.  Since Cary Grant, the Golden we got in November, died after only 15 days here of a rare and very severe heart ailment, we were quite worried about George, especially since he came from the same breeder.  Fortunately, though, the Heart of George was good – nary a murmur.

Saturday, as you see above, we took a family pic of me, George and Mr. Bear.  Could not get George to stand still.  We had the idea of taking a pic every week to monitor his growth.  At the vet Thursday George was 8.3 pounds.  Yesterday, George was 9.5 pounds.  I did some research – and  in another month, George should be bigger than me, just over 20 pounds.  And a month after that, George should be around 35 pounds.   He is getting big fast and  he has already left that cute as a button little puppy stage and started to enter the all legs and paws gawky stage.

George doesn’t have all his shots, so we are being careful about where he goes.  But we did have my cousin Juno, an Australian Shepherd, come to play with George.  You see in the slideshow a picture of George, me, Juno, my hooman cousing Summer, and her best friend Caitlin at the Ainsley Institute.  And also Mr. Bear tried to get in the picture as well.

Remember last week I said George is going to be a lot mellower than Cary Grant was?  Well, I was wrong.  George has turned out to be quite the high energy troublemaker.  Looking back, I guess Cary was indeed dying the whole time he was here.  Cary was a lot sweeter and mellower and slept more  – probably the poor guy just didn’t ever feel right.  Word on the street, though, is Cary is feeling great now as the dessert chef at my brother Angus Fala’s Boiled Egg and Ice Cream Parlor at the Rainbow Bridge.  Though George is a “replacement” Golden from Cary’s breeder, no one can replace Cary.  No one.

So how am I getting along with George?  Well, for the first few days I wanted nothing to do with George.  As you can see here, from a video over the weekend, my Zone of Hostility, which I learned from my brother Angus, is implemented and performing quite nicely.

However, a break through last night – I did play with George for a bit.  But then I was done, and he still wanted to play, but I let him know with a sharp growl that play time was officially over.  He was confused, but it’s great to keep him guessing.

Anyway, that’s my report of George’s first week.

Ainsley McKenna